Spring is in the Air

Am I the only one who is noticing Spring Fever? I am getting back into poetry from being inspired by all the new scents of Bath and Body. There is even one that is top secret and all I can say is that they have figured out how to bottle love. I love the arts! One especially of an up and coming Spring artist of Anne Geddes. She is so av-ant garde. Or should I say av-ant garden sss-sss. Anyway I discovered her by the calendar from B&B. It was from 1997 and someone was just going to throw perfectly good baby art away! I am so inspired to write these days! What you say?? Un sample you say?? All right all right, I will share mine art! Mine poem: "Love. No. Spring. Yes. Lavender. Peach. Good. In. The. Neighborhood. Art. Artiste.Amour. The. End." It's a new type of poem that I invented that I will prolly send to New York I guess.  Sigh. I love the arts! Anyway, I guess you could say mine spirits have even been lifted by this dear job. I write by the glow of mine peach candle and netflix of course. I am watching SheDevil if you must know, and let me just say that I can tell why the academy is always giving Merly Streep the name of American Sweetheart. She is like a young Clarice of "It Takes Two." I have known many she devils in mine day thank you very much. And sometimes I think that Rosanne is the perfect woman?? Ahh anyway, it is hard being in the corporate world of the retail giant. More of a challenge than the rat race himself! I am not exactly adjusted like a fish out of water. It is hard because they don't approve of mine half hourly bafroom breaks and they never do the biggest loser competitions or coworker bonding! I even suggested a thing of cheering every morning to get up morale for to make sells and they said no! Like at Claire's I always hear them do a cheer before they open up! I wanted to do one of, "Our team can beat anyone! You know this game will soon be done! Cause we're the best around, and we show it! Yeah, yeah, you know it!" Who couldn't use the extra bump of tude and style??? Sometimes bosses can be toughies. Whatever. B&BW is rubbing off in every part of my life! I bet my ex is living in regret to know that I have been going on long evening walks these days and I really feel like a healthy new dude! From dud to dude! Also i got a new haircut. Or should I say, haircute!!! Ha, take that! Let me just say that I have a new lease on life and am feelig just so giggly and young again! So love...no. Spring. Yes.

Thigs are lookeen up :)

So most of you are thinking that I was in a pretty sad mood of when she who must not be named was being a little devil to mine heart. BUT that is the last I will speak of this publicly. That is neither here but there. Anywhoo, I have been getting mine life back into the groove of things. Such as, I was working out at a hip new spa for that I found a thig of on groupon. It was a experience let me tell you. . I am just a normal American Dude and not trying to be a Europe guy or whatnot. 

I'm not much into the witchcraft of when peeps tell you that sugar is a drug or "bad" for "you"Jeez. Whatever, I have been eating a carnton of Parm goldfish crackers everyday and I can't start my day without em! I went for a consulltation at the workout gym and they were telling me thigs of how to lose weight. I guess I have a long road to fitness. I asked them litrally how long the road of fitness it would be if it was a real road and they said it was something of the road to perdition? Pssh whatever, I maybe say that it is the road of great wall of china. They also were saying I was confusing them of my daily eating routines of bacob and ramen and chicken wings and spaghetti o's and funyuns and begged me to go to the hospital asap... but my diet works for me and it is mine business. They also said that abs are found in the kitchen and not in the gym??? What the what??!? And they said I was cafusing to talk to!

The best news that I was saving for last is that I got a new job at....drum....roll........please...........Bath and Body Works! Besically I was in there last Saturday because I got a coupon in the mail of getting any wallflower and you would get a free peach candle. Peach candles are prolly around one of my more favorite candles these days I guess. I was in there and since they only had 50 candles per store it was a madhouse and long story short my leg got trampled by a crowd and then a pyramid display of Sweet Pea bruised my leg.

Anyway I was crying when they found me and I mentioned that this happened in the last lawsuit and they said that thing of lets make a deal because no need to bring the law into this and it was just a little scratch. I guess the manager was pretty impressed by my devotion or something because he offered me a part time job! I will be very busy of this and my office job, but it is worth it and I will prolly sneak J in so I can still be a good single dad. They wont even notice him since he barely makes a peep. Maybe put him in a backpack? I will have to use my brains to sneak him.

And my other job, I can just leave a lil early. It is so worth it because it such a happy place and I have been a fan since 1992 when I worked at the mall across from it as Hot Dog on a Stick. Haha, I still have mine uniform! Anyway, my body shape was not ezzactly a perfect shape for that uniform and I couldn't wear it and had to wear my Demonia Creepers (memember those?), Jincos, and my Chi-town bulls jersey. Ahh to be young again. My mom said they let me do it for she said she would sue hot dog on a stick for discrimination??? Anyway, my first day is tomorrow! First item of business is to ax my boss if the real name is Bathroom and Body Works or is it just urban legend??? Wish this dude luck!