My Own Words

With this new year that has just taken its breath there are so many possibilities out there with my name on them. One night I was sitting on my couch after t.v. and mt heart felt like that part in "My Best Friend's Wedding" when they dance on the boat and the bridge makes a shadow and the moment past. I was thinking, this is a year that I should be me! Celebrate me as a person and a human. So tonight I decided that I shall either do comedy at a club OR tell witty stories at open mic night. I shall use this very blog to write and practice my material. What is my comedy style? Well many of you remember the show "Full House" and how friend Joey Gladstone is a stand-up comedian? Well my style is like the young Taj Mowry who plays Teddy, Michelle's friend. I just feel like my soul is waiting to tell stories in a way that the spoken word can speak to people. I shall be a renaissance un man, who does one thing so well. I have confidence, in ME!

The Bachelor

I have been doing research on love, and as part of that research, I have been observing the show of "The Bachelor." I have been learning many things of love, and how dating is in the real world. I have been doing dating all wrong lolololol. What a lucky man to hold in his own hands all those beautiful...roses. These are highest quality roses, like velvet that you can rub on your face or make a joke by putting it in your teeth to be romantic. The women are ok, but not my type at all. Oh to be master of the roses and hand them out! I think that the closest I have ever been to having a bachelor un moment was when I handed out daisies to all the mothers on mother's day at church. What a lucky devil (pardon the pun of religion ;). I wonder if those roses are as soft as the kleenex with lotion squirted into them??? Maybe one day I can have a love triangle and pretend I am Ben Flajnik? Too bad I do not have a strong chin, curled hair, and fancy blazers. Sigh. It is indeed a rich man's world? I may not stand a chance, but one day I will be the bachelor of my own life!

Advice. We all need it sometimes

 So I am somewhat of a person who gives great advice. I put out add for people to send me their prolems. Ta-da!! I hope this helps many people in the community and world and even universe:

Dear impossible breakfast:
I’m from a very small town...I mean if my cat had a litter of kittens everyone would know about it before noon. Anyway, my ex is coming into town this weekend and he’s bringing his new “fiancee”. He’s bringing her around to meet the whole clan and I just don’t know if I’m ready to face him and his new found love. The whole town is coming together for a celebratory dinner and I was invited by my ex’s family. So my question, do I go? I’m not currently dating anyone so should I bring my best guy friend? OR should I just stay home and watch pay-per-view? help!
 Sincerely, Broken Hearted

Dear Broken Hearted, First I shall say that we sound like twins. I too have had many a broken heard from past lovers. I once had a recent break up 7 months ago where I could tell on FB that she was always secretly trying to make
me feel jealous. The trick was to take the bait but always do it in private where you can weep and get your feeligs out. What i am saying is that I wonder if I will ever move on again or will i
always be lonely? Your ex sounds like a pompous American, like a Dalmatian who tries to wear a top hat just for stupid attention. Don’t go to the clan’s feast. Instead send a friend to go and either secretly film it or write down every detail so you can replay if over and over in your mind, preferably every night before you slumber. Because you just shouldn’t move forward. Instead dwell on the love you are missing in your life and never give up or give anyone else another chance. It is a true romance story. Yours, impossible breafest

Fashion

Fashion. Fashion? Fashion! It's everywhere! After a trip into the big city I couldn't help but notice that merhaps I need to spiff up the old closet and show the world who I really am. This may sound odd, but I use fashion to express my individuality. I prefer to shop for vintage, unique, and avant- garde pieces. I adore shops such as "Target", "Eddie Baur", and of course "Talbots". Their style for mens are quite liberating. People always tell me, they say, "You are the.most. fashionable. person!!!" They ask how I do it? Well it is a gift I was born in. I joke that I in fact came out of the womb in a 4 piece suit ;) But that is neither here but here. Next time you want to be in fashion, just start a trend and throw on a scarf or even a pendent. Who knows, mebbe you can learn a page from my book...my fashion book ;)