Tuesday, May 21, 2013
What not About?
Hello. I gotta say it has NOT been the life. My recent unemployment has made me force myself to get un roommate to help pay the rents. My landlord has been KILLER. I am a bad mood dude. Cuz 1. My roommate is harrible and B) I really just want that thing of eating whatever you want without gaining weight, and also that elusive emotion called love. I mean, the heart wants what the heart wants. I can't help that mine heart beats with the beat of the drum and that my drum has a beat no one can hear (perhaps I can make my flirtations include poetry?). And the sad thing is, my roomie wants to do that thing of being single and going out on the town since women are " a friggin ball and chain" and my back prollems/emotional wedgie (ssss) wont let me go out. His name is Loreal. French or sumsing? He is also a friggen abercrombie model. He looks like Chad Kroeger (that one hunk from Nickelback). Like he can afford to call women prison wardens. I myself have not been so lucky, so when I do that to their faces, they just look at me all disgusted and leaving red hand marks across mine face. Lucky Loreal. He also is a master of disguise ;). Sometimes in the midday when I'm here with Jonathan and Loreal is at his job, I do the filthy act of burping on Loreal's toothbrush cuz all Jonathan barks about is 'Loreal this' and 'Loreal that' cuz Loreal needs to be taken down a notch (with his fancy mystery job and always pressed silken boxers/shirts). I axe myself what job because he hasnt paid his rent since he said he is 'following hims dream' and is a victim of check fraud, but seems to still be a un victim after 6 years. Ah well. I consider mineself un good samirtan. Loreal also promised he would pay the rent, and he offered to dry clean my special suit after wearing it thrice for his business ventures. And that since I will buy all the groceries for the next three months he will for sure do it for the next three after that. Also if I picked un fight with him over the love of Jonathan he would kick mine butt. I have to be honest here... I can't even do the #2 in front of him. Heck, I have to go down the street at midnight when all the people out there want my body to relieve myself. I need un new roommate! One that does not do that thing of pointing at your shirt and saying 'whats that' and you looking all innocent and cafused down at your shirt but then him flicking you in the nose. Hogwash!
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