Meanwhile...

Sigh.  Can't sleep.  Why, you ask?  I hate to be the bearer of bad news that is the same.

But I just wonder if I will ever be in a relationship?? I should not blame myself, for the holidays are a tumultuous time for many souls.  I yearn for my very own special someone both day and night.

As Christina Perry states, "I have cried waiting a 1,000 years each night."  I was recently dumped 3 months ago and was sifting through my wardrobe when I saw It. 

It was like stumbling upon lost footage.  I found a piece of paper where they did that thing of when you put on lipstick and kiss a piece of paper for to be in love.  I lost it!  Tears and sobs strangling my heart.

Needless to say I feel like when Jerry Maguire leaves and the child with the glassies is upset to the mother.  Why?  Why?  Why am I in this lonely trap with my heart?

You've Got Mail

Just viewed the film "You've Got Mail."  My feelings are torn.  The most important message (pardon the pun) is that maybe online dating could be fore me.  I sometimes remind my own self of Tom Hanks.  It's very random that two people can collect love from one another over seemingly meaningless forms of conversation.

Like that part about "tall decaf mocccachino."  It made me chuckle.  I wonder if very soon I could be carrying a rose in a restaurant to meet an anonymous stranger.  Maybe if my business was closing down due to an anonymous lover, I too would "get mail."

New Years Resolution

It's that time again--when one runs through their life like a broken house looking for everything to fix.  That's right--it's New Years.  So much pressure for resolutions! 

Sometimes the thought of that mean fat diapered Baby New Year makes me see red laserballs from my eyes!  I have given up on resolutions and instead celebrate "me."  I call up my parentals and ask them, "tell me about when I was a baby."  I suggest this exercise for everybody. 

I look at myself for hours in the mirror and adore myself.  I even find my face shape.  Why spend time trying to "improve" yourself when you can find the real you instead.

New Years resolutions--I say throw um' to the dogs! Chili dogs!

New Year's Eve

Well, here we are, another passage marked by time.  I shan't believe that another year has slipped through my open fingers, like crumbs at breafast.

On a more somber tune, I can't help but reflect whilst that one song played by a saxaphone is whizzing through my mind.  There have been melancholy moments for sure. 

What a time to ponder.  But I shall sigh and quit pondering life through somber eyeglasses. 

Off to neverland!  My heart feels like a zhu-zhu pet is running amiss in it!

Holiday Eating

I write this by the light of the fridge.

I will just spit it out--I am repulsed by me!

Every holiday I vow I shall not fall into the Christmas munchies.  I chuckle at the thought of figgy pudding. 
I belong to the school of thought that calories don't count from November to January!  (I once upon a time peered a magnet with that very mantra).

But I battle--eat carrot sticks like a very rodent, or live like a plump happy pup, fat on mother's milk?

If I had but one superhero power, I would choose to eat myself silly without gaining un ounce!

Pets Are People Too!

Oddly enough, I find myself yearning for a pet.  But not just any pet.  As many of you have gathered from my musings, I have not been so lucky in the department of love.

I wander the halls of the department of love at night, much like a ghost at Disneyland dancing in the mansion's ceiling.

But that is here and not there.

A pet.  Do I get a dog whose loyalty could launch 1,000 ships of love?

Or a cat, whose icy challenges reward you with purrrrs?

A bird?  I heard they have peas as a brains?

Or a worm farm for the practical human?

A monkey is very esspensive.  On my lowly budget I could not afford its prescription glasses.

Rodents?  I am too scared since legend has it that when they scream it would steal my soul.

I shall perhaps just let fate bring love to me. <3

 

Soulmates

I often write about love because beneath the cynical layer of sad coal dust lies the heart of a true romantic.

The age old question is always this: do soulmates, in fact, exist?  If so will I find mine like 2 puzzle pieces in the game of love?  Or flying toward each other like birds of paradise set against a sunset?

One may think of me as a beacon of strength.  They say that I am the strongest person I know.  This is due to my gifted tongue, soaked in a bath of wisdom.

But really I remind myself of a tear streaming down the face of the saddest person in the world.  Just another tear dropped in jagged glass. 

Shall I ever find my angel of music?  If so, I shall anticipate them wholeheartedly. 

If not, I am just another sad person's tear. 

Jobs

Jobs.

Sometimes they are good.  Sometimes they are bad.

I sometimes sit back in my swivelled chair and say, "This. is. the life."

But lately I feel like a tiger in a straight jacket.

Or that thing of when a monkey has to sit behind glass and play chess while scientists watch them. Well I will soon rebel. I am too smart for my job.

My soul is too beautiful to be locked in the corporate dungeon in this rat race.

It's like that feather in "Forrest Gump."  That follows him around in the wind.  Sigh.

When will I ever get to my destination in this crazy jumble we call "life"?

True Love?

I am gazing at my breath on the window pane and wondering if I shall ever find true love.  Is love really even real or just a farce we all make up to chase after, like White Rabbit in Wonderland?? 

My heart has been through the meat grinder of life and I fear I shall eat every meal alone.  Is this half ever going to become a whole?

I need the courage to roar in the face of cold hard facts/the future and say, "As You Wish," like that thing of "Princess Diaries" when the man says that and rolls down the hill.

I shall find it!  I shall!

The Help

After viewing the film of "The Help," I have been deeply in thought.  Mainly about life, human life, and the spirit of life.

One reflects and is left with the opinion--why is life so hard these days?  Mainly I was also refreshed with the historical knowledge that I absorbed.  Who knew...that people dressed up so much  back in yesteryear?  What a powerful film.

War Horse

Just reviewed the film "War Horse."  One must not believe the title because the horses are not in fact in a war with one another.  It was indeed a thrilling and gorgeous film that placed thoughts of life dancing in my head. 

When Joey says to War Horse that they shall always return to one another in the war, a single tear stram down my cheek.  Whilst watching the mother I chuckled at her sassiness toward Pa.

Whenever I am in the midst of challenges I shall dream of war Horse in the barbed wire, wrapped in a triumphant heart. Alas.